Holiday Overwhelm & Exhaustion Is Real: Why December Feels Heavy & How to Support Your Mental Health

(A Story for Anyone Who Feels More Overwhelmed Than Festive Right Now)

I’m sitting at my desk this morning, with a candle burning low, journal cracked open, coffee cooling faster than I can drink it, and an all too familiar thought comes in:

I'm so tired and the month has only just begun.

I know as I think this, I am not alone in how I feel.

FACT: This is the month when everyone feels exhausted.

Every December, without fail, my friends, neighbours, colleagues and clients say the same thing:

“I don’t know why I feel so exhausted… I wish I could feel more festive and excited for the holidays.”

Know this...If you’ve ever felt that quiet tug-of-war between wanting to enjoy the season and wanting to crawl under a blanket and sleep for a week, you’re in good company. And you’re not doing anything wrong. There’s a reason the holidays hit so hard, emotionally, mentally, and physically. Holiday overwhelm is real, so let’s talk about it.

December Has a Way of Bringing Up the Heavy Stuff

We often imagine the holidays as a time of togetherness, celebration, and sparkle. But for many people in real life, December often lands with a thud.

The days get darker. The to-do lists get longer. The expectations get sharper. And without fail your energy disappears and you're soon in a fatigue filled deficit.

This month has a habit of pulling old memories to the surface: the good ones, the complicated ones, and the ones you wish would stay in the back of the closet with the tangled Christmas lights.

Historically, energetically, and by the design of our calendar, December is a season of endings. Endings always come with a sense of mental and emotional “weight.” Even if everything in your life is objectively fine, your body somatically feels the shift.

The Push & Pull of the Holidays: Wanting to Rest, Feeling Pressure to Perform

One of the biggest themes I see consistently during this season is an internal tug-of-war:

• You want rest… but you feel guilty slowing down.

• You crave quiet moments… but you’re pulled in ten different directions.

• You want to feel joy… but your nervous system is running on fumes.

• You need boundaries… but the holidays are a boundary-testing Olympics.

Let me be abundantly clear on this : It’s not you.

It’s the collision of physiology, expectations, and cultural pressure.

Winter by its very nature is a time to slow down and go inwards. The colder weather and naturally slows the body and wants us to rest and regenerate during the winter season. But capitalism (and holiday culture) demand you speed up. This creates emotional friction: the part of you that wants hibernation battling the part that feels obligated to “show up” and “be cheerful.”

Of course you’re exhausted!!!!

Your Nervous System Isn’t Broken ...It’s Responding to Reality

Let’s name some of the reasons your body might feel heavier this month:

1. Seasonal darkness affects mood and energy.

Shorter days shift circadian rhythms and impact emotional regulation.

2. Routines fall apart.

Irregular meals, disrupted sleep, and busy schedules reduce nervous system stability.

3. Social and family expectations pile up.

Even positive gatherings require a lot of mental and emotional labour.

4. Financial pressure activates survival stress.

Holiday spending, travel, and gift-giving add a silent layer of tension, especially in the current economic climate.

5. Reflection on the past year can feel confronting.

Goals you didn’t reach. Chapters you didn’t close. Healing still in progress.

When clients tell me they feel “off,” I remind them they’re not malfunctioning. They’re responding like a human being in a season that demands more from us than we have the capacity to give.

So What Helps? Small, Practical Rituals for Holiday Overwhelm

Let's be honest here, I am not saying that these are going to make all of the stress and exhaustion go away. The goal here is to reduce some of the overwhelm and make things more manageable. You do not need to overhaul your entire life to feel more grounded this season. Start with tiny acts of care; things that make your system feel even 2% more settled.

Here are a few I use myself (and recommend in session):

Create a 5-minute morning ritual.

Light a candle. Stretch. Breathe. Look out a window. Anything that signals “I’m here. I’m in my body.” I personally like to make my coffee and savour it while admiring the Christmas Tree and reading whatever book I have on the go.

Decide ahead of time what you’re not doing.

Honestly, this changes everything. Pick one thing to drop from your December list: baking, hosting, card-writing… anything that feels soul sucking or is not bringing you the joy it should this year. A few years ago I stopped sending cards to everyone and it felt like a big weight lifted off of my shoulders. The guilt was there the first year but everyone understands and most happily adjusted their expectations.

Choose “micro-rest” instead of waiting for a day off.

Three minutes in your parked car while you are waiting for the kids after practice. A pause before entering a family event. A hot drink between tasks. A few minutes at your desk to look out at the snow or stretch your legs. Rest doesn’t have to be big to be effective.

Create a “future me” boundary.

Instead of “What do people expect from me?” ask, “What will tomorrow’s version of me be grateful I said no to today?” Then, choose that.

Let your feelings be part of the season, not a problem to fix.

You can be grateful and overwhelmed. Excited and exhausted. Festive and needing space. Contradictions are part of being human.

One Final Note: You’re Allowed to Be Exactly As You Are

If the holidays feel heavy, slow, or emotionally complicated, you’re not the only one.

You’re not “missing the holiday spirit.” You’re not failing your family. You’re not falling behind.

You’re moving through a month that asks a lot of your heart and your nervous system.

So as you light your own candle, sit quietly with your breath, or just flat out find yourself sighing as you flop yourself down onto the couch after a chaotic day, know this:

You’re allowed to feel how you feel.

You’re allowed to rest.

And you’re allowed to move through this season at your own pace.

Your body is wiser than you think, and it’s trying to protect the parts of you that need gentleness most. Don't feel guilty for listening to its messages, it's asking you to slow down because it's what this season is meant for.